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Author Topic: The Venus and Mars thing!  (Read 2635 times)
2plug Craig
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« on: May 10, 2006, 11:55:31 pm »

>I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differs so
>much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have
>never figured out why men think with their heads and women with their
>hearts.
>
> For example, one evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed.
> Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel
> like it, I just want you to hold me."
>
> I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
>
> So, she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to hear...
> "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me
> to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look
> by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you
> in the bedroom?"
>
> Realizing nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
>
> The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
> her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big
> department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several very
> expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told her
> we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to complement her new
> clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We went onto the
> jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings.
>
> Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave
> short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she
> asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.
> I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was
> almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
>
> Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all
> dear, let's go to the cashier."
>
> I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel
> like it."
>
> Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled
> WHAT?"
>
> I then said "honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're
> just not in touch with my financial means as a man enough for me to
> satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look
> like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for
> who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
>
> Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.      Grin
« Last Edit: May 11, 2006, 05:00:09 am by 2plug Craig » Logged

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so67vw
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« Reply #1 on: May 11, 2006, 12:20:17 am »

Wow... My wife can't get enough....  Tongue
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"insignificant other"
2plug Craig
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« Reply #2 on: May 11, 2006, 05:06:07 am »

I better clarify, that I received this in an email..!!!  Embarrassed

My better half would string me up if she saw that I had posted  something like that about us on the internet!   Lips Sealed

She's a great Gal...!!!!  Grin
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ErikTheRed
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« Reply #3 on: May 11, 2006, 05:12:40 am »

Sounds like a good idea...............was that supposed to be a joke, or advice?

Grin
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May God forever bless these United States. Amen.
Craig Merrow
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« Reply #4 on: May 11, 2006, 08:04:37 pm »

Hmmm, my ex was never interested in sex...probably because she was getting it from someone else, which is why she is now my ex! 
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carapace
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« Reply #5 on: May 11, 2006, 08:11:15 pm »

That's a classic!  Funny then , still pretty dang funny...
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Simon Ramirez
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Phil 4:13
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